Dear prospective Clint Wattenberg Invitational competitor: I think it's cute you want to step to me. You want to sit next to me and pretend you're in my league. It's all adorable. But let's keep it from being uncomfortable and possibly illegal. Allow me to extend an invitation. A coveted invitation to the 4th Annual Clint Wattenberg Invitational. The event itself is beyond simple: You, myself, and perhaps a few others will sit down at a table and try to put down a Tacos De Acapulco burrito faster than everyone else. But therein lies the problem. You're eating against me. And you can't win. But let me invite you to give it a shot. I look forward to seeing you, shaking your hand...and then breaking you. --Clint Wattenberg, founder and current champion |